emotionless or bubbly, which is the real facade
by kitty cat lysanne
Summary: Mikan was a normal girl, but then she lost her memory en two years later she got bitten. with that she lost to feel emotions. 5 years later is when we come in. she meets someone behind her house in the forest and goes to Gakuen Alice. read and enjoy.
1. this is my life

**Emotionless or Bubbly, which is the real me and which the façade.**

_**angels and demons /broken wings . ( written by me) **_

with broken wings

i fly to heaven

i'm spreading them all.

i fall to the earth.

having changes, losing hope.

why can't we see, that all we do is hoping for a better time.

why can't we see, who we are. missing everything around us.

nothing left of us to remain.

what we have to do is nothing in our memories.

no remains are left.

so how are we supposed to know.

What we're supposed to do.

looking down a broken road.

trying to remember.

it's just in vain.

we will never know.

what to do in a situation.

what to do when nothings left.

when do we finally see.

What we're supposed to do.

looking down a broken road.

trying to remember.

it's just in vain.

we will never know.

first an angel and then we changed.

becoming demons in the first place.

We suck the blood of innocent people.

the vampires will rule for sure.

hiding my shame

there's nothing left that i could do.

* * *

My name is Mikan Sakura, I have hazel eyes and waist-length brown hair.

What should I tell over my life, one thing: it sucks.

Everyone calls me an angel, but I'm no angel. To be precise, I was one. Cute, innocent, sweet, caring. Al of that stuff. But know I ain't anymore.

I always imagined to fly in the sky, when I die, I would go to heaven. Now I know that I would fall half way. My wings of innocence are broken. I will never leave the earth, I'll never be in the sky.

I've had tall of opportunities, but in the end, everything always failed. And now I lost all my hope.

I'm nothing in this world, nothing but thrash. But no one can help but hope that it will change, that's everything that I can still do, pray and hope. The real me has died, no one even noticed, no one, not even my oji-chan, the one who took care of me, instead of my mother, since I've known.

I cannot see anything around me, everything is always blurry, always there is something missing.

In the end nothing will be accomplished, nothing will be left of the shattered souls, just nothing.

Why don't we have a clue about what we should do in our life. Why is it always pretending.

This is just me. I act stupid, clumsy. Nobody knows it's just an act. That that side has died 5 years ago. And 2 years before that I lost my memory. The real me is gone. Why can't they just see.

Now I'm standing for my foster home. Looking down the road. No one is out, it's late, it's already dark. Dusk has fallen. The road is broken, just like me. Always I try to remember, looking at the same road, over and over again. Sometimes I think that there was a reason why I lost my memory, but why, that's the question. I will never know what to do, I have nothing left, nothing to help me remember. When will the time come when I would finally know. Tears straining my cheeks. But I don't notice them. Most of my feelings are sealed away. Sealed with my change.

No one knows this side of me, but I will tell you. This is it.

first an angel and then we changed.

becoming demons in the first place.

We suck the blood of innocent people.

Now you've probably figured out my secret, but for who don't know it yet: I'm a vampire.

A bloodsucker. I despise myself. I'm hiding in the forests every moment that is possible. Hiding my shame. I hate my existence, I hate myself. What can I do about it, nothing. There's nothing left of my life. That ended years ago. The words that one said are still stuck in my head: the vampires will rule for sure. And I'm sure I will never forget it.

But also the things they say about vampires aren't true. I can walk in the sunlight, I love garlics, swimming is my favourite sport. About the stake, everyone would die with something through the heart, so that doesn't count.


	2. a meeting

Now I'm just walking through the forest behind my home. It's unusual quietly. It's freaking me out.

No birds chirping, no hoofs of deer's or whatever. No sniffling from boars. No growls from bears.

Like I said unusual quiet. i walk further in the forest, to the river in the middle. Nothing's there.

It feels empty, abandoned. Like it never felt before. Loneliness. I turn around and hear a sound after me. The move of a tree branch. I quickly snap my head. I stand eye in eye with someone. Everything about him is dark, his clothes are black, the eyes that peer through the mask are darker than everything I've ever seen. His aura seems to consume everything, nothing but dark seems visible at first sight. But know I can feel it better. Pain, sadness, loses, manipulated, a puppet, hatred, agony, hated from everyone, loneliness. The feeling seeping in me. Chills running down my spine. I feel pity for the person. This person makes my head spin, making question over everything.

Like what kind of things must have happened to make him like this.

Who he manipulates and who manipulate him? why he is a puppet? who's the puppet master? why would someone dress like that? Who did he lose?

But I don't even know if it's a man or woman. Which man wears high-heels.

his mask is the thing out of place, it's white. Plain white. The kind of white that will be covered by the red blood of victims. Tears welling up, not yet streaming over my cheeks. Showing the overwhelming feelings I'm feeling. The person stands still, stiller than everyone I've ever met.

"Who are you, person in black?" my curiosity took over.

"My name is Persona, I'm taking you to Gakuen Alice." The authority is evident in his voice. The coldness scares me, it's so emotionless. He makes me believe that I don't have a choice, only by his voice. But I wouldn't be me if someone would intimidate me, I'm a vampire, but I still have my pride!

"Why should I go with you, there's nothing there, just like here, so tell me?" he seemed taken aback by my question. He snorts and continues. "You don't have a choice, if you don't come with me peacefully, I would have to take you forcefully." I thought to hear a feeling in his voice, the pain.

"If I come with you, what would happen? Would I also became a puppet, Persona?"

I saw recognition flicker in his eyes. But he seemed to be confused, like he thought that no one would figure it out, and absolutely not someone who he just met.

"I don't know, it's all the ESP's decision. He takes and does what's needed." He paused. "for his own good." His voice was again emotionless. "Why do you hide your emotions, the pain and sadness?"

"That is information that you won't know." "Persona, you will be my sensei if I go there, right?"

"That is if you're unlucky." My next answer was not what he expected. "I don't think so, I would like to know you." Silence engulfed us. His mind was processing my answer. I just smiled.

"What is the real goal of Gakuen Alice, it's not for the elite, so tell me that, please.

"I will tell you because you're going there. It's a school for people with special powers. Called Alice's."

"I will gladly joins it, if I can at least say goodbye to oji-chan." "that will be okay, you have 2 hours to pack your stuff and get back here, after that we will leave. Till then, goodbye."

I walked back to my home casually. Leaving the dark man behind. I guess it's a man because of the voice.

I walk 15 minutes and I'm back at the road, I immediately walk inside and go to my oji-chan' chamber. He is working there, he is a writer, not very famous, but good.

"oji-chan." He looks at me and smiles, a smile like I used to have, a real genuine smile, not a fake.

"What's wrong Mikan?" I took a breath, expecting a sad face after i told the news. I closed my eyes and spoke: "I can go to an elite school, a school financed by the government, people of that school are known to be the best. Someone just told me the news. So I he to go. And I can't come home a lot because it's very far away. I'm sorry." I opened my eyes and saw him smiling, still, tears were visible but he still looked happy. And his words made that sure. "I'm glad for you, I'm proud of you."

I smiled back at him, tears also visible in my eyes. But that was part of my mask, I didn't feel a thing.

Not the pain that the most felt, a very small amount of it, but that was al.

I went to my room to get my stuff. Only the important things. Everything I would need fit in one bag.

The bag was made by one of my former friends, but she had to leave. Her name was Hotaru Imai.

She was an girl with the gift to invent everything that she wanted. I wouldn't be surprised to see her in that school. The bag made everything shrinks, I guess everything in my room would fit in it, but I don't want to try to lift my bed up and put it in the bag.

I closed the bag and lifted it, it was not heavy like I expected, but that would be because Hotaru made it. I walked through the door and yelled one last goodbye, it would be the last for a long time.

"Sayōnara!" I started to run, tears running over my face. Why, I don't know, it just happened.

I sat down against a tree, suddenly my chest began to hurt. My breathing was halting.

After I was calmed down I went to the place from earlier. Everywhere were the sounds back.

It seemed like they told me goodbye.

Finally I reached the place. The man still stood there.

"Are you ready to leave?" he seemed concerned. I smiled. "I'm fine."

And the next was unexpected. "Why is your smile a fake?" no one ever saw, and he saw. He was different just like me. He was perceptive.

"Since 5 years ago. I don't feel anything. At least not hard like the most. I sometimes feel pain, but not much. I'm robbed from my emotions." He seemed shocked. Pity was visible in his eyes.

"I don't need pity, some would see it as a gift, I'm not one of them but it is not necessary to pity me.

Together we walked further and further away from my home, leaving my normal life behind me.

We walked in total silence. I was calmed by the sounds of nature. And he seemed to be afraid to say something wrong.

With my eyes closed I walked through the forest, not once tripping.

After a walk for a quarter we finely halted, before us stood a black limousine. The windows were blackened nothing could be seem from the outside. I took place at one side and persona sat down on the opposite. Still engulfed by silence. I enjoy it, the silence, no lies, no fakes, just silence.

After, I guess, half an hour we started to talk a little. We talked about the school, its regulation, how it looked, the teacher. Which teacher to avoid and obey and which don't mind anything.

He told me that a will probably get in the class of Narumi Anjou. If I was right, and the description was quiet explicit, I wouldn't like him. He would be cheerful, happy, hyper, annoying, loud, dramatic, and the plus point don't giving about what the students do. When I asked what his Alice was he was quiet nervous. "it's human pheromone, it means that he can control everyone." Now I was sure I wouldn't like him. I sighed. Persona seemed to smirk, what got over hi, suddenly.

"What's up, Persona." "there aren't many students that hate him, and who don't like him prefer him above me. I'm the most hated. And you like think you would like me better, it's weird."

I glared at him. But I also remembered his emotions, the hidden ones, the loneliness. Was that the reason for it. I decided to keep quiet about it.

I looked outside. The car passing tall of trees and building, it seemed so peaceful.


	3. my other side

Finally we arrived at the school, Gakuen Alice. The car came to an halt.

It was huge. A street went towards the school, it was surrounded by Sakura- trees. Beautiful.

I couldn't believe my eyes. It was still too early to see them in full blossom. But here it happens.

I looked at Persona, he was emotionless, again. "How can the trees be in the blossom period ,it's still too early?" "What I said before, people with special gifts." That was right. Some would say that this is a school for freaks, just like me.

I wonder what Terricia thinks about it, she always calls everyone freaks, I'm not an exemption. She said always that she would go to the best school of the country, an elite school, you guess the name.

Gakuen Alice! And it's a school for freaks. Even some information on Terrecia. 1. She's a bitch. 2. She's a slut 3. She's arrogant 's a liar and an faker. She has the appearance of a sweet person but is the opposite. She has green eyes and has strawberry blond hair, or whatever they call it.

If I had to say that someone was the devil, she would be number one on the list, even above me.

After the walk we reached the first building when we entered it grew silent.

I smiled widely and acted hyper. "Sensei, who will guide me, and in which class will I be?" Persona seemed taken aback, were was the silent calm girl from before.

A man wearing some kind of feminine clothes walked towards me, he acted more hyper than me, it was freaking me out. His personality seemed to come close to what Persona described earlier, this must be Narumi. "Are you Narumi- sensei, are you my new teacher?" I asked, curiosity clearly hear able in my voice. "You're Mikan Sakura, I'm glad I get to teach such a cute girl." I flinched at that last sentence. It went unnoticeable by the most. And because Persona snickered, I knew he had noticed.

"Mikan~chan, follow me to your room." "Hai Sensei!" I answered back.

We went to another building, 3 minutes walking from the school building. It were the dormitories.

We went to the upper floor, at that floor was apparently my room. We stood for a door where a star enclosed by a circle was on. He halted and opened his mouth. "This is your room, you're a special star." I didn't know where he was talking about, how should I have known, I'm new in this school.

"What does it mean?" "It's your ranking, you're one of the best, goodbye. Be outside classroom 2B at 8.00. I opened the door and was amazed by the size and the technology.

I closed my eyes, stopping my façade. I sighed. This will be my personality for the rest of the years, the fake me. The liar, that's just me. I looked at the clock and saw that it was too early to sleep.

It was yet 7.00. the sun was already setting. A beautiful sight for the most, for me it meant problems.

My enemy was the night, my blood thirst, the thing that made me different. I looked outside, a few minutes and the sun would be down, then my other side will take control.

I jumped out of my room and landed in a tree, it was nicely positioned. I jumped from branch to branch till I hit the floor. I landed perfectly and ran to the forest. The forest was dark, bad.

Sounds that I'd never heard before all around me. Creeping under my skin. Making me shudder in fear. I heard hoofs, close, but like they belonged to something big, something bigger than an Oliphant. I swallowed. Suddenly, silence, all sounds died. Death seemed on his way. I took a fighting position. Ow, I forgot to mention. I'm trained in karate and Judo. I had to learn to defend myself. I was a way to easy prey, but that was before. The thing ahead was a death man.

I heard stone move behind me, trees branches swaying, some even broke, all other sounds gone.

I turned around, only to meet a dark presence, who it was, I still don't know.

I heard another sound. I turned my head and when I turned around the man had moved, he was right before me, man he was fast. "Hello Persona, what are you doing here?" I asked politely. He rose his eyebrows which signals that he would like to ask me the same question. "Don't matter to ask, I won't tell you, you haven't earned my thrust, nobody has it so far."

"Put this mask on, don't think you want to have you façade blown. I have a student now. Maybe you can train with him." "I would like that, but it probably won't be wise." I hesitated, feeling my teeth grow. "Sorry sensei, I have to go." I speed of. Leaving him flabbergasted. Without me knowing someone just saw me talk with the teacher as if we were childhood friends.

I run and run, getting as far away from the people, just so I wouldn't hurt someone.

I hated this side of me. I felt my throat burn, I needed blood. My senses sharpened and my other side took over. Now I was a vampire. Ready to kill everything. Kill them by drinking their blood.

Even though I don't have any control, I can still see it. The moments pictured in my mind.

An animal crossed my path. No hesitation. Death. The blood sapling out the body. My body moving towards it, kneeling down. I felled my own nausea but I couldn't do anything. I drank his blood. My thirst decreased. But it wasn't enough yet. I searched further and further. I signalled the animals to stay away. I searched for hours, I found nothing. I was glad for it. I slowly saw the sun rising. My teeth grew normal. I was myself again, had again gained control over my body. But I was lost.

I decided to climb a tree to see where I was and how to get back. The trees were sadly enough higher than normal. It was insane. I climbed and climbed till I finally reached the top. The sight was amazing. I looked down on thousands' of trees, birds, all colours, all forms, flying around. The sun in the distance, rising slowly, warming the land. I breathed the fresh air. This was my favourite kind of spot. Total peace. I saw which way I had to go to go back and let myself fall down. Some people used to call me a cat. I always ended on my feet. Others said I was one lucky girl, others cursed me for it, but none of them matter for me anyways .I casually walked back to my dorm and sat on my bed. I lay down and closed my eyes, I had one hour to sleep left. It was already 6 o'clock. Normally it would be enough to be rested enough, today wouldn't be an exemption. Within one minute I had drifted away in dreams. To be thruth, I'm glad that I can't sleep long. I always get hunted down by nightmares. Nightmares of things I've never seen before. Like they were part of my memory before I lost them.


	4. collisions

Freedom

_Walking down another place,_

Not knowing where to go

Caring about everything

Not knowing where it goes

Walking down a river

Not knowing where it ends

Looking at the animals

_Seeing them where the river bends_

Passing the time by

Knowing everything will fly by

Copying the sounds I caught

Seeing things that didn't seem right

_Following your eyes_

Flying by

Knowing al

_Greeting the freedom_

That flows through us al

Knowing everything won't end

Seeing everything coming by, again, again, and again.

Don't you see the truth behind

_All the lies you heard in their minds_

Giving them a case to remember for the chase

Flying by

Knowing al

Greeting the freedom

That flows through us al

Knowing everything won't end

For once my dreams were not around, no nightmares. I woke up and sighed contended. I waked to my closet. If I tell you that it is huge. Then I mean it bigger than huge, it's gigantic. Clothes were on every hanger. I didn't have that much clothes, so where did they come from. Dresses, skirt, T- shirts, shorts jeans. At the back a shoe cabinet. Filled with shoes of every kind, all colours, just like the birds from earlier. I walked to a stand which stood lose from the rest. There were the school uniforms.

They were rather normal. The skirts were only rather high, I already knew I wouldn't like it. Especially with the character I pretend to be, the clumsy me, I mean. I put it on, it fitted perfectly.

The uniform was a red skirt and a black shirt. A white collar with a red bow. I know very plain.

When I had my uniform on I went to do my hair. Because I had another personality in class, another hairstyle. I did my hair in two pigtails. A very cute style, for little children, so not for me, but it will do.

I quietly walked towards the classroom it was 3 for 8.00. and I don't know what will happen with that freaks as a teacher if I'm late. I started to run. I collided with someone, apologized quickly without looking who I collided with. Everyone stepped aside when they saw me running like a wild bull.

Inwardly I was laughing my ass of. I stopped for the teachers' lounge and waited for Narumi.

He came out wide smiling. It was creeping me out but I smiled back. Together we walked towards the class. He told me the routine, and what I should tell, at least.

I waited in the hall, waiting on Narumi to call me in. after 5 minutes what seemed like hours in this crowded and loud, I walked in and faced the class. "Hello, I'm Mikan Sakura, and i don't know what my Alice is, before someone asks it. Are there any questions?" it kept silent. For the most uncomforted cause someone stood up and started to ask a question and some other things but why should it actually matter. What she said and ask is this.

"What's your rank?" "I'm a Special star"

"that's not fair, how do we even know if you have an Alice, you could have bribed the head."

I almost started laughing at the girl, she was foolish. But I had to stay in my character.

"Why do you say such things?" tears close to falling. And the next sound made me smile.

"baka, baka, baka." The infamous sound of the baka- gun. The sound I was used to hear every hour, before she moved.

"Hotaru, you're also here, long time no see." I ran towards her, trying to hug her. I almost evaded her bullets but held myself down on the last minute, it would be suspicious otherwise, to Hotaru I mean.

"Baka, what are you doing here, you didn't follow me here, did you."

"No, someone went to the forest behind my house, he was different but nice. He took me here."

"Was it Narumi?" her voice made the disgust clear to the teacher. I smiled and knew what the next reaction would be.

"No, Persona- sensei!" "What!" the whole class looked at me full of shock and disbelieve.

"You're a real baka, he is bad news, stay away from that man." Her face was still emotionless, like always, but her eyes betrayed her, they showed concern. "It's fine, he won't harm me, not directly at least." Everyone was gaping at me." And I, I still acted bubbly.

"Sensei, where do I seat." He answered happily. "At the back with Natsume, he is the boy with black hair and the manga over his head. He will also be your partner." "Hai, sensei." I walked to the back and saw someone stick out her leg. I 'accidentally' stumbled over it. Who would have thought to be immediately the victim. "gomen."I bowed to her and walked to the back. I sat down and greeted my seat mate overenthusiastic. He was silent, he ignored me. Bastard. I pouted.

The next words shocked me. "Hallo Polka dots." I knew immediately what he meant but counted to ten. And I shouted, the bomb exploded. "Pervert!" the whole class looked at me, all the girls glaring at me. Why, you ask, how should I know for sure. Suddenly I was lifted in the air. I balled my fist.

Natsume noticed it, no one else. I acted like I was scared. Natsume looked at me with suspicion.

He knew I wasn't who I pretended to be.

"Put her down, she is nothing." He dropped me and I landed flat on my feet.

I ran away quickly, no one should see me, my façade wasn't holding long anymore.

I run and run. Losing all sense of direction till I collided with someone, again. "Hello kiddo, why the rush, you have class." I looked down. Kept quiet. "What's your name, I haven't seen you before."

That question I would answer. "My name is Sakura, Mikan Sakura." "nice to meet you, so tell me why were you running?" I looked up, he looked by my emotionless face. "I needed to be out of there. That's just it." I shrugged for the effect. He was the first nice one, except Hotaru.

I talked with him for some time and enjoyed his presence. After I was completely calmed down I flashed him a smile. He seemed dazzled and I ran away , to the forest, I needed to be alone, for some time. I didn't want to hurt someone, I don't want to make someone worry, that's why I hide.

I don't know where I'm going, just walking, walking away from the rest, only because I care.

What is caring about someone really, you don't want to hurt someone, and so hurt that one. You want someone to be safe, and that's why you act like you don't like that one. It's stupid but true.

I walk into the forest, I just follow the path, even though I don't know where it leads to.

While walking I hear a river, peaceful, streaming. Even water isn't trustworthy. It keeps us alive, makes us look like who we are but at the same time it kills us, Tsunami's all over the world. Just like hurting someone, being friends. I walk towards the river and walk with it. I follow the bending's, look around , seeing animals all around. Time passed by, unnoticed, I enjoyed it, the silence and calming sounds of nature. I know that everything ends, everything flies past us, unnoticed by most, even by me. The birds chirping, I started to whistle, making sounds like them, unnoticed I began to copy their sound. A smile on my face. Then I saw something move, something that should be gone. I saw my oji-chan. He isn't here, so why do I see him, do I miss him, is that this feeling? The pain. A tear rolled over my cheeks. But still I smiled. "Oji-chan, I will be strong, I will be someone to be proud of, thrust me." I whispered it. The man looked to the side and I follow his eyes. I feel someone's presence, but I don't see anything, I feel like I'm blind. I keep looking at the same spot, not once I blinked. The time passing by. Finally I can see the person. It's Tsubasa. He looks at me, like he tried to do something.

I know he tried, he tried to control me. My shadow is within his reach. But it didn't work. I know how people are, most at least. If something is unsure, they try to figure it out or try to control it. And he, he just wants to know what's wrong with me, why I ran off. He wants to know me. But he won't.

"Did you just try to control me by my shadow?" I asked angrily. He kept silent. I calmed down and walked away. Leaving Tsubasa alone, alone in the shadows. just because I can't have it if someone has power over me, no one will ever have it, I won't let it happen. Freedom is the thing I've always had, everyone has it, how deep it is buried, that's the question, but there is always a way to get it.

And so no one will ever know everything, the knowledge grows, . nanosecond.

I know, nothing will end, never, it's a cycle which would always continue.

Things always stay the same, you see them over and over again. Nothing changed. But they believed they have changed. They can't see the truth, lives are built on lies. They think they tell the truth, but the truth is always personally changed. And so, before someone would control me, they should know everything about me, and they will never know.

Knowing everything won't end.


	5. the voice

I know, nothing will end, never, it's a cycle which would always continue.

Things always stay the same, you see them over and over again. Nothing changed. But they believed they have changed. They can't see the truth, lives are built on lies. They think they tell the truth, but the truth is always personally changed. And so, before someone would control me, they should know everything about me, and they will never know.

Knowing everything won't end.

* * *

I walk and walk, a single tear rolled over my cheek. Why I don't know. Maybe because I thought he was nice, but he's just like the rest, manipulative. Unknowingly I've entered a darker part.

My eyes closed, walking, not seeing anything around me. And when I opened my eyes, darkness was everywhere. Since I was bitten the dark scared me. Always, again and again. Why I tell you.

I got bitten when I was walking in a forest, like this, only stars in the sky, no moon. It was dark.

A hand grabbed my shoulder. "Cute girls like you shouldn't wander in places as this at dark. You might hurt yourself." And then a shock went through my body, he had bitten me. I felt him suck the blood. I was paralysed. And then everything went black. When I was back inside everything felt heavy, the next night he came back. He walked into my room, still the darkness. His eyes were purple, shining even in the dark. Scaring me. Hating the nights, hating the dark. Nigh after night he came back. After some time I locked myself in a closet, he destroyed it and grabbed me out of it.

It was petrifying. And the other reason is because in the dark my other self-talks to me, tries to control me. Trying to let me drink the blood of innocents, just like that side. I heard the voice again. "You can do it, kill the manipulator. You can do it. Kill everyone who hurts you, just suck their blood." I heard it whisper softly, the danger seeping out of it. I shivered. I curled myself up, trying to get her out. Trying to get myself back, to not go insane. My fingers gripping in the earth. I heard someone beside me. My eyes closed, trying to get her back in the mental cage. Finally I had calmed down and opened my eyes. Beside me was Persona. He had seen everything. My darkest secret. I looked at him, my eyes wide open, shock is seen in my eyes. His eyes, they seemed different than before, even colder. But there was another emotion, worry. But why would he worry about me. He doesn't even know me. Oh boy, how wrong I was. I was lifted off the ground and carried, carried by Persona. He took me back to the school and brought me to the classroom.

At the room everyone was shocked. Who wouldn't. before them stood the always cold, sadistic and heartless teacher of the school, with the new girl, Mikan Sakura, in his arms. He put her down and gave her a last look. It looks suspicious, to most at least. Some were utterly shocked. And then mostly Natsume. He knew this man now for 7 years now. That was the time he entered the academy, and his hell began. The man, known as a murderer, ready to do everything, hurting his students in all ways, was worried about someone, who was this girl.

"comme."she bowed to the teacher. "her eyes void of emotions. "Sorry for interrupting your class."

The teacher motion her to take place and she walked to the back. Her eyes seemed to flicker.

She sat down and took her books out of her bag pack. It seemed like she had cried.

The lesson seemed to pass quickly. She looked at the teacher, not taking notes, just observing.

While Natsume looked at her, trying to figure her out what was wrong with her. He only hided it by having his manga over his head. The bell signalled the end of the les. Everyone left, as soon as possible, it was lunch time. Only one person was rather slow, which probably angered the inventor because the next that was seen was a girl flying to the wall. And then a wailing new girl.

"Hotaru, you Meany, why'd you do that?" she said between hiccups. "Don't try to fool me, what happened to you, to make you a fake." Natsume was already on the corridor but heard it, and of course he couldn't resist the urge to eaves drop on them.

"You're lucky I can still remember you. You know." "What happened to the over exited idiot I knew? The one that made everyone smile, for real?" "If I told you, you wouldn't believe me." "Try me."

"I'm bitten by a vampire, stolen from emotions, hearing a voice in the dark, trying to let me kill."

Her eyes seemed to have agony in it, but it disappeared as soon as it came.

"Then one thing, what is your connection with Persona?" "I told you before, he took me to this place, that's everything I know. Or I should have known him 7 years ago, before I lost my memories, I don't know." When Natsume had heard enough he walked away, missing the part where she told about her memory loss. He walked to the Sakura tree and lay down on a branch. Processing the information, there was a vampire in the school, in his class. Why would they allow something as that in. they were bad, but that girl was different. He looked down and saw Mikan, alone. Taking place under the tree. She sighed and leaned back while closing her eyes. She seemed peaceful.

I saw shadow walking towards the tree. "Hello Sakura, Sorry from earlier." "It doesn't matter. Not anymore." He looked at her shocked. "I just wanted to apologize for trying to control you through your shadow." "I hate it when something takes freedom away, but there are far worse things. Let's become friends." She smiled, a dazzling smile, a real one. After that she stood up and left "Goodbye Tsubasa- sempai!" she yelled. After that I jumped down. "What did you do to her shadow. he stiffled, slowly turning around, he seemed in shock. "You were here?" he asked carefully, if it wasn't for the punishment I would have laugh at his face. "uhm, I had to give you a message from Persona, he wants to see you at the clearing at 6 today, he wants someone to join you." After that he left and I was left alone. I wondered who would join me, would It be Sakura, I don't think she would make it through. The bell rang signalling the end of the recess. I just lay down on the tree, why would I care about the classes. I just lay there while the classes continued. Finally the school was over and I had to be prepared for the torture of Persona's lesson. I walked to my room to get my mask.

I saw Sakura looking bored, like she didn't give a shit about anything, that was weird, at the start she was just as weird as Narumi. I went inside and put my mask on. I jumped out of my window and ran to the forest, to the meeting place. Persona told me to wait, arg, I hated waiting. After a couple of minutes a masked girl stepped into the clearing, she had brown hair in one ponytail, a black mask with blood spats on in. "Sorry that I'm late, Persona." Her voice sounded like Polka's , but that girl couldn't be Polka, right." "Ah, Hello bloody angel, how are you?" did he just seriously asked that? Is he interested in her wellbeing, what the hell! I almost screamed in horror. She just sighed and looked at Persona. "You wanted me to train right, so let's begin before I run out of time." She was visibly bored. Persona coughed and stood strait. "Alright, Bloody angel, meet Kuro Neko.


	6. the trainig

(i won't go in details of fighting, i don't even know how i should do it.)

They stood looking at each other, Bloody angel knew the identity of the Kuro Neko,

Natsume Hyuuga, her partner. The Kuro Neko tried to figure out who the girl was, she could be Mikan Sakura, but made that thought go away, but he didn't know how right he was.

She looked at Persona and he looked at her. There was seriously something wrong with Persona was all that entered Natsume mind at that moment. "Bloody Angel, will train with you but will not do missions, she would be a threat to everyone." "hn" was al that Natsume said. He could be a threat to but he had to do missions, so what was so special about this girl. Now he would soon figure it out.

"Why is she dangerous?" "You would be glad if you would never figure it out, I assure you of that."

His icy voice was again normal. She looked aside, just stared in the nothing, where was she thinking about. Somewhere she knew this place, knew Persona, but how, what was the connection.

Suddenly a voice helped her out of her mind. "Get ready, Kuro Neko, Bloody Angel." He took his stance but she stayed still, looking bored like before . He threw a fireball, it just disappeared when it neared her, just who was she, what was her Alice. She looked at him, her eyes impassive. He then ran towards her, that was his only option if his Alice wouldn't work. he ran, readying himself to hit her, he missed. She stepped aside, just a millisecond before he would hit her. He stopped and tried to kick her right after the missed punch but miss, again. She had already jumped up, so high that even he not could do. He was impressed, by a girl that he just met. He snorted and jumped in the tree, branch to branch till he finally got where she was. Still impassive, no sweat. Just who was she? She wasn't focused. He saw her looking up, the sun was still up, but in less than an quarter of an hour it would be set. He thought that he saw fear. Fear for the dark, or something else. He tried attacking her again, she still avoided and we fight, high in the trees. And then she avoided a hit and she fell. He was shocked, he knew no one would survive such a fall.

He climbed down as fast as he could. And there he saw her standing, looking in the distant, looking at a lost memory. The sun had was almost set. He looked around, Persona has disappeared. The question was why. Then he saw something walk towards them, it was some wolf like creature. One off the gruesome, the murderess eyes shone. He ran towards her, tried to warn her. It attacked. He felt sorry. But what he saw made him walk back. Her eyes had changed, they were red, shining in the dark.

Natsume POV

She looked at the animal and it backed away. Further and further. "Did you really wanted to attack me? You're a fool, but yeah, you're just an animal." she scuffed. she seemed to disappear and reappear behind it, she hit it in the neck, the cracking sound rang in my ears, one hit broke his neck. The next was something I would never forget. She bowed down to his neck, teeth growing, they shone for a moment and they sunk in the victim. A vampire, a creature of the night, a killer. That girl was Mikan Sakura. A murderer. He saw her drink the blood, the pleasure off the warm blood flowing thought her throat.

He was disgusted and suppressed the feeling to vomit. She looked up and looked straight at him. A smirk formed on her face. "Another one to play with." suddenly she stopped. I was rooted on my spot. She seemed to argue with herself. Her voice seemed to change, to plea me to go, begging, said.

"Please, go, now run." She seemed to struggle for just those words, and so I ran away. I, the feared and mighty Natsume Hyuuga just ran away, away from one girl. He stopped and looked back.

He saw the girl, she just walked, slowly towards him. The smirk still evident on her face. Suddenly she was on the flour. It was Persona. "Hyuuga, run or else I'm gonna have your head tomorrow. She isn't her normal self." I saw him struggling to hold her down so I decided that it was best to go, and I didn't want to lose my head. I saw Persona being slammed against a tree. "Why do you have to dominate her, make her loose herself!" I heard Persona scream. I couldn't help but wonder what their connection was, Persona hasn't been out for at least 7 years, so how could they have known each other. I was at the end of the forest. Screaming and growling was heard from within the forest.

I heard some noises and saw Imai beside me, what would that freaking weird inventor have to do here. I saw her fly inside the forest. Mikan was almost out of the forest. Persona jumped her from behind, Hotaru quickly stepped of her scooter and saw her pour something in her. After that she didn't move anymore. Persona picked her up. "Thanks Imai, I wouldn't be able to hold her any longer." Persona, just tell me what has happened to her." I know less then you do, …." "What is your connection with that baka?" her voice sounded fearsome, I felt myself shiver. Only two persons could make me this way, and they stood opposite of each other. I saw her glare at him, but he didn't budge. The next words were worse than what I had seen this night. "She is my little sister, but I had to leave to this school, 8 years ago. And she has completely forgotten about me." If I could believe my eyes I would say that he was crying. "She lost all her memories from before seven years ago, I'm barely in it, I left 6 years ago. But she sure has changed, she isn't cheerful anymore, and you know the reason." "I know that she was bitten by a vampire, and with that she lost her emotions, that's what I've understand of her file. She won't thrust me, I'm a complete stranger to her now. I hate it."

This were the people that I thought were evil and emotionless, but both cared about that little girl.

I scoffed and walked to my room, I would confront them tomorrow.


	7. devils

The night seemed to go on forever, I couldn't get a wink of sleep. My thoughts full of what I've seen and the shocking news. Who would have thought Persona could be good person, I've never thought of it. When I closed my eyes, I saw the picture of Mikan, the stoic one become the bloodthirsty monster of a moment ago. I stepped out of my bed and looked around, I just couldn't get my sleep.

I walked to my balcony and looked to the which was rising. I saw someone move, it was quick and in the shadows. I caught a glimpse of a brunet. I decided to jump down to confront her. But she was already climbing the wall. I backed away and stood still. She just jumped on my balcony. Her eyes were closed. She took a step back and sat down on the railing. She moved her head to the left and opened her eyes. She didn't look at me, but I could see the sadness in her eyes.

I'm sorry for tonight, I had to much fun and forgot to run away. She got out to soon. Do you remember Persona? I had to ask it, even though I hated him. I don't know, everything seems familiar but I can't remember. She put her hand at her head. I never had felt pity for someone. But like they say: for everything is a first. i shut my eyes, when I opened them again, she was gone.

I don't know why but I don't mind that she's a vampire, even though my sister was kidnaped by them. That moment I cursed them and said that I will kill them all, but some are different. That girl was bitten and changed in a different person. A person that liked to kill. And that made me remember the moment, Suddenly she stood still and pleaded me to go, an different voice, sweet, soft, caring. The voice of the real Mikan. I took my coat and left the room. I walked to my tree. No one came here. I jumped to the tree and lifted myself on it. i took my manga out my pocket and started reading. Some time passed by when I saw her run by the tree, Mikan. I followed her and saw her sit down. It was dark and her voice changed, I could hear another voice. " You should kill, kill everyone. They hurt you, kill them, simply kill them." The voice made me shudder. I saw her. She was rolled up in a ball and tried to get out of it. she jelled. "Get out of my head, get out!" she seemed desperate. I walked towards her, slowly, silently. I took place beside her and took her hand in mine.

The voice seemed angry.  
"kill him, now!" I heard it jell but she seemed to relax and the voice faded away. I relaxed. That was really weird. "Thanks." She whispered. I just looked at her and nodded. Persona stepped out the darkness and walked towards her. "Are you alright?" "I'm fine now. Can we get out of the dark now, I don't know how long she will be gone." She seemed really afraid, but I have to admit that I would also be freaked out if I heard that voice more often. But hell that I would tell anyone, I still have my pride. I helped her up, and walked beside her. I gave her small glances. Her face was emotionless. Just like last time. I looked ahead and saw Persona look at us. He even seemed to glare. And then I realised why. I still had her hand in mine. I quickly let go and looked to side. I was lucky she couldn't see my face, a blush evident on my face. What is happening to me. I never blush and I'm never embarrassed, why now, and why when Persona is near. I noticed the killer aura and the evilness coming from Persona, I'm so death. I felt something grip my hand again and looked at my hand. It was Mikan. But she was definitely scaring me. her eyes blood red, a smirk on her face. She was again the vampire her. Persona hadn't noticed it yet. "Persona, can you help me, for a second." He turned around with a glare, ready to remark, when he saw the red eyes. "Let go of that boy now." He seemed calm. He probably was. Why would he care if I die, I'm nothing in his eyes, stupid bastard.

"Why should I, she is pushing me back and back, over and over, and I need some blood. What's better than the friend of the host." She was seriously freaking me out. This form is a devil, that's her, THE DEVIL! By who is she bitten to turn out like this?

"What are you going to do now, sensei?" her voice mocking, and smirk on her face. Like she could do whatever she wanted, and she probably could, if that little girl wasn't as strong as she was.

"Hold on filthy vampire!" was shouted throughout the forest. She looked around, disorientated, not knowing where the sound came from. Suddenly Imai appeared behind her, a bottle in her hand.

She gripped the neck and forced her to drink. Mikan passed out. I kneeled and picked her up.

It was against my pride, but I kept my life thanks to her. "Thanks Imai." She only nod and looked at Mikan. "I will get that filthy vampire which lay his hands on you, I promise." And I, I believed her and was agreeing with her. I would get it, but I will torture it and when I had enough of it I would let it burn in the sunlight. We went back, Imai told me which room was Mikan's and I laid her on her bad in her room. she seemed so peaceful, her eyes closed, her lips slightly parted.

i gave her one more glance and left the room. it still was hard to imagine Mikan as the devil herself. but she was.

i opened the door of my room, and two people, or better pawns of the devil, sat on my bed. "Where do i own the pleasure, Imai, Persona."

"I know you want to beat the hell out of the vampire who bit her, you're not the only one. we all have the same idea." i simply looked at them. i couldn't care less whatever happend to them, they made my life hell.

Imai selling that stupid pictures that made girls go crazy. And Persona, don't get me started. "How are you planning to take revenge, or better to say, kill the vampire? " i asked them "I guess the methods like in stories won't want to put a stake throught the heart?" i was just mocking her.


	8. struggle allies

_What is that defines good_

_What is what defines bad._

_The deeds or how others act._

* * *

Hotaru looked at Persona. "you know what I'm thinking?" an evil smile on her face. He was smiling evilly too. "I guess I do." Natsume felt the shivers run down his back. They really were the only ones, plus the Mikan he recently met, who could do that to him. He balled his fists. Feeling the will to kill whoever did this to that girl again.

"What is the plan. Do you even know the person who did this?" he looked Hotaru right in the eyes. "Tell me." it came out as an order which he regretted right after as the baka-gun appeared and he was shot against the wall with the last shot. "Don't you dare order me, Hyuuga." Her emotionless voice spoke. He sat down and sighed. Remembering to never order that girl around.

Persona stood up and pulled him to stand up again. "It's not wise to make enemies under allies, Imai-san." She looked to the side. "It was the right thing to do at the moment." She sighed. "Hyuuga I'm sorry but I just want to kill that one before she bites a person and would likely kill herself because of it." his eyes widened. "Why would she. …"

Persona and Hotaru shared a glance. "Do you believe in angels?" he kept silent. Remembering his little sister. A girl who was like an angel. He nodded. "Alright. That will make it easier." She sighed. "Mikan, she was like an angel. Her smile brightening everyone's world. Clumsy but like a cat when fell. The gods seemed to love her. She seemed stupid but when I asked her something she seemed to be right. She wanted everyone to feel fine. To feel smart. Vampires. They are attracted to that kind. The innocent ones. But you know. Not everything seems as it is. The vampires. They are only after those who are likely to go to heaven, they leave the others alone, unlike what you normally hear. They hunt the ones whose wings are white. The ones that think about others before themselves." His mind went back to his dear sister. She was like the innocent herself too. Was that why she was taken? Hotaru seemed to halt.

"Most angel like children are taken, not bitten immediately. Some are kept captive for years, not one bite taken. The vampires seem to select them. To see who are the purest. To see which will become a vampire, and which would just die. They like the struggle. But the most annoying thing about them is that they also have Alices. And the fourth one isn't dangerous for them so they really are monsters. She looked out the window."

Both were wondering how she knew so much things about them. They heard the shuffling from feed and walked to the door. Mikan was standing there. "Sorry for what happened Natsume-kun. I.. I … I try to control it but … it … it's to strong when it's dark. I hate the dark the purple eyes of the vampire seems to be hunting me." she went to Hotaru and hugged her. The emotionless side completely gone.

He wondered if that was for self-preservation. He looked at Persona. His mask was back on. His eyes immediately seemed as dark as the night. All emotion seemed to be taken out of it. they saw Mikan turn towards him and hug him. "You shouldn't feel so lonely. You shouldn't feel so much hatred towards yourself. It isn't good to hate yourself, Persona-san." He looked at the girl. "You shouldn't hate yourself either." She grinned. "Touché."

She looked out the window. She touched her neck. He realized that was probably were she was bitten. He walked towards her and put a hand on her shoulder. He noticed her flinch before she relaxed. "You shouldn't get too close to vampires. We are dangerous." He looked away. "The other one is dangerous, not you." All saw her smile a real smile. "I'm glad to hear that. take good care off her."

She fell down. He caught her. Wondering what was meant with 'take good care of her'. Persona frowned. "She's still protecting us it seems." Hotaru heard it and started wondering what he meant with her. Silence engulfed them. Natsume put her down on his bed and sat down. "Persona, just who are you and your family?" Persona kept silent. Imai for one didn't know it either and was carefully listening. The baka-gun was taken out but he still didn't speak. His mind turning and turning around. Wondering what he could tell and what not. "It's better not to know. That's what I can say."

He stood up without answering their questions. "Take good care of her. I leave her in your hands. Hyuuga." Hotaru glared at Natsume and left soon after the other. "Dare to hurt her and I will hunt you around the world. Mark my word, Hyuuga." She briskly walked away. Natsume stared at Mikan who was now sleeping in his bed. He sat at the end and looked outside. The sun was now on his highest spot. The classes had already started long ago.

His best friend Ruka probably worrying about where he was. He heard a knock on his door and the voice of Ruka accompanied it. he walked towards the door. And when he opened it he was faced with a worrying Ruka. Checking quickly if he had any wounds. "Did you have a mission yesterday?" Natsume shook his head. "Some things are better left unsaid." Ruka walked in and saw the new girl in Natsume's bed. He started stuttering. Natsume sighed and put a hand on his shoulder. Ruka stepped aside. He sighed again and sat down again. "Don't worry, I didn't do anything to her. And if I would try I would be murdered by Persona and Imai. I am not trying my luck."

Ruka saw her stir and looking uncomfortable. He frowned. Natsume changed his position and sat closer to her. His ear close by. "Don't leave. Don't .. nii-san!" she sat right immediately. looking around the room for a second. "Did I walk to your room?" Natsume rolled his eyes and stood up. "You did. It was rather weird. Persona and Imai were here that moment too." She seemed to flush. "What did I do?" he smirked. Not saying a word. Persona appeared out of nowhere and hit him. "Don't let her think things like that."

Ruka's eyes widened. "Ne, Persona-san. Do you know my brother?" it fell silent, a cold vibe went through the room. "He is save. That's all you need to know." He saw the girl on the bed frown. A small fake smile on her face. "I understand. Please take care of me." when Persona was gone she turned emotionless. "Why would nii-san lie. Some things wrong."

She stood up and put her hand on Natsume's shoulder. "Tell me what happened before and what is with Nii-san." Her aura growing darker by the second. Ruka taking steps back till he was against the wall. She suddenly started coughing. "Don't get any closer." Natsume kept standing still as Ruka carefully walked towards her. Natsume put out his hands. "Follow her command. Don't come any closer." Ruka protested as he saw the state she was in. Imai walked in. "Did you make her angry?" a dark aura also surrounding her. Ruka was scared again and wanted to run away but the dark was all around. "I didn't. ask Persona why he lied to her and why she knows now." she nodded and walked towards Mikan. "You're still my Mikan right."

Ruka frowned. Not knowing what had happened before. Mikan turned towards her and hugged her. "my head hurts. Let the voice stop! Please." Her voice grew to a whisper. Natsume went closer and took her hand. "Is this better or does it get worse?" she grabbed her head. "Kill him, kill the liar, kill anyone who hurts you. You can do it. come on." The creepy voice came out. Natsume walked towards the light switch and turned it on. He opened the window and light was everywhere. Mikan seemed to calm down. "Thanks. It's …" she didn't utter a word after that. Hotaru and Natsume looked at each other and nodded. a silent promise. the bastard would go down. whoever it was. he made the worst enemies he could've made.


End file.
